Dr. Vicki Belo on lesson learned from the breakup: "Utak over heart."

"I'm going for meditation, so, hopefully to get to know myself better. Then, I don't know, get the skills, at this age, to learn how to discern when something's good for you or not," says Dr. Vicki Belo about the few things she learned from her breakup wi

Author: Nerisa Almo

"Black going to pink."

This is how Dr. Vicki Belo described her life after the recent breakup with three-year boyfriend Dr. Hayden Kho. Entertainment media saw the celebrity surgeon wearing all pink, including her bag, during the unveiling of Bench's newest line of scents in support of Pink for Life Foundation at Glorietta 5 in Makati City on January 17.

"I'm getting pink, lively pink, di ba? Pink is the color of love, it's the color of being alive. I think, I'm feeling good and I'm happy again," the lady doctor cheerfully said.

The 52-year-old cosmetics surgeon (who will be turning 53 on January 25) admitted that she's still in the process of healing after discovering the infidelity of her 27-year-old boyfriend.

"It's not that easy naman, three years is a long time," she said. "Actually, ang nangyari nga sa akin, medyo na-shock ako, di ba? Kaya hindi ako masyadong nagsasalita. Kasi, hindi ko nga alam kung ano ang naka-hit sa akin. Parang bomba na nag-explode."

When the news broke out about the split, Dr. Vicki remained silent and only interviews of Dr. Hayden and alleged third party Katrina Halili came out on television and in newspapers.

Dr. Vicki explained, "Ang ginagawa ko, super anti-social ako, wala akong kinakausap kahit kanino."

Then, she told the media how the incident drew her close to God. She related, "Sa bahay lang ako, pumupunta lang ako sa Blessed Sacrament, nagro-rosaryo lang ako. I read all the spiritual books, I listen to all the spiritually inspiring tapes kasi I don't want to be bitter. You know, ayaw ko talaga. I'm trying to go more for what I learned. I learned from what happened, rather than be bitter or angry because I think that's a very negative emotion. So, when things happen, I always go straight na to [ask], 'God, what lesson are you trying to teach me? So, I can just learn it.'"

She added later on that the experience somehow reminded her of rebuilding her relationship with God, who has kept her strong all throughout.

"To tell you frankly, when I'm happy, I don't pray that much. And although I always pray and thank God all the time, talagang it's less. Talagang I only learned and I only grow when I have pain in my life. Then, that's the only time I evolve into another stage of my life," said the beauty surgeon.

Aside from God, Dr. Vicki also expressed her gratitude to her children, Quark and Crystalle, and her former husband Atom Henares, as well as . She thanked all the people, too, who have supported her and included her in their prayers.

The famous surgeon to the stars said, "Nagpapasalamat lang po ako kasi I learned that my children love me so much and they're super supportive. And my ex-husband is super supportive. Then, I learned that so many people were praying for me and wanted me [to recover]. They're really... I could feel it, e. That they want me... I mean, I'm recovering faster because of all the prayers."

LESSONS LEARNED. With this hurtful experience, Dr. Vicki admitted that she has learned a lot of things about herself and about relationships.

Answering the question of Startalk reporter Gorgy Rula, the lady surgeon said, "I learned, number one, is that I don't love myself so much, that I end up loving other people more. Number two, I'm kinda bobo and I'm kinda naÃ¯ve and I trust so much also.

"So, I think I'm gonna be a little more careful about relationships, not being so open. Kasi, I'm a very open person, e. I always give everybody the benefit of the doubt na you're always good unless you prove that you're bad. So, maybe I'll come from the place na, 'Teka muna, you have to prove you're good first.'"

Dr. Vicki continued, "Parang, I think, what's happening to me now is I'm very insecure and I'm very unsure of my decision, of my reading of people. Parang I don't trust myself at all anymore. You know, kasi parang mali lahat ng ginawa ko, mali ang perception ko ng relationship, lahat, e... Kaya nakakaiyak."

THANK YOU FOR THE HAPPY MEMORIES. As mentioned earlier in the interview, Dr. Vicki does not want to embittered by the breakup. This may be the reason she was still thankful to Dr. Hayden.

As an added lesson from the experience, the lady surgeon said, I learned to thank Hayden for three years of happiness because I was very happy naman. You know, what can I... he didn't do naman anything bad to me during the relationship."

She further explained, "Wala naman siyang ginagawa sa likod ko na hindi ko alam. Pero as far as he treated me, never naman niya ako ginamit, never naman niya ako binastos. In our relationship, he always took care naman."

In spite of these happy memories, Dr. Vicki could not lie about her current feelings towards her former boyfriend. She honestly told the media, "Ngayon, may halong galit. Galit na parang may halong betrayal, awa na... Ewan ko, parang nagfu-fluctuate pa lahat ng feelings."

Dr. Vicki also took this opportunity to clear the rumors that she accepted her ex-boyfriend again. "Hindi kami talaga together. Please, tigilan n'yo na. Hindi po totoo na nagkabalikan [kami]," she pleaded to people who circulated the false news.

ON THE ALLEGED CAUSE OF BREAKUP. While talking about the lessons she learned, Dr. Vicki mentioned, "Well, endorser-wise, I guess it's a very good lesson for me na... because I always thought na I was very close to Katrina and I'm not pala."

Reports pointed to Katrina as one of the causes of the Vicki-Hayden split. The young actress and Dr. Hayden admitted in recent interviews that they had a short relationship while he was still committed to Dr. Vicki.

However, Dr. Vicki herself clarified:

"It's not so much of Katrina, but just the lying, di ba?" explained Dr. Vicki. "Parang I feel na I don't know him because he was able to do those things and I didn't know at all. And he was able to lie to me because I asked him a couple of times about Katrina, because the rumors were loud, di ba? And he told me, 'It's not true.' Talagang he's swearing up and down. So, it's so hard. How can I trust him? And you can't have a relationship unless you trust someone, di ba?

"It was just more masakit because it was Katrina. And I just thought, you know, Katrina is my baby, our baby actually. Super close naman siya sa akin at saka mabait naman na bata 'yon all those times."

Gorgy then asked Dr. Vicki, "Ano po ang eksaktong feeling mo kay Katrina ngayon?"

She answered, "Alam mo, nag-dinner kami pero hindi talaga ako nagalit. Ewan ko lang, I feel betrayed. I'm always in the betrayed side. Hindi ako parang, 'Walanghiya ka.' Walang ganun, e. Kasi sobra siyang bait sa akin. She was my endorser for three years, she's very sweet."

The Startalk reporter also tried to ask the lady doctor about the rumored involvement of sexy comedienne Rufa Mae Quinto in this issue, but she just laughed and said, "Ay, no comment. Gorgy, I love you, byebye."

After the three-year love affair with Dr. Hayden, the beauty surgeon said that she wants to give her heart a rest from loving and hurting. In fact, she even stated, "Ayaw ko na. Ayaw ko na talaga."

Source: Philippine Entertainment Portal